For Your A”muse”ment

August 18, 2007 at 4:44 pm (Love, Marriage, Myth, Relationships, Second Life, Sex)

Muse, Felice Ficherelli 1605 - 1660

O Muses, o high genius, aid me now!
O memory that engraved the things I saw,
Here shall your worth be manifest to all!

-Dante Alighieri, The Inferno

The desire to discover one’s purpose in life is not a new tradition, but a lofty and long-sought goal for men and women the world over. This pursuit of purpose has been immortalized in countless books, movies, songs, and poems throughout history. I personally began my quest to unearth my unique raison d’etre when I was quite young and continue this journey even today.

Despite knowing this theme remains so prevalent in real life, I was surprised to notice recently my propensity to question and seek my purpose within my Second Life. Why am I here, I wondered most broadly. But more specifically, what do I bring to my lovers and friends here and what do I receive in return?

As I examined them with greater inquisitive scrutiny, I realized that each of the relationships I have enjoyed since I began my SL journey share a common thread. It seems I have met the most incredible men when they needed me most; each at a time when he hungered for his own unique dose of inspiration, love, and support to help lead him back to the light of his own life (real and virtual) and loves (yes, including RL partners and wives).

I discovered that my role as lover and muse is to listen and lavish upon my beloved the gifts of love, acceptance, self-discovery, and great sex to help him recapture his mojo and gain the strength to take that new-found radiance back into his real life so that all who surround him can enjoy his brilliance once again. I guess you could say I’m a modern-day Mary Poppins or Nanny McPhee for relationships, called upon to help my men find their way back to the selves they lost, the selves they thought they were, or the selves they aspire to be. Or maybe I just simply help them get unstuck.

Now I realize this sounds like I think I’m all that. But I promise I’m not basking in the glow of my own professed self importance. On the contrary, this role, although immensely rewarding in itself, comes with its own price. Because the nature of this “work” is temporary. And like Mary Poppins or Nanny McPhee, I too must someday fly with the shifting winds onto the next who needs my nurturing.

Despite the costs, however, I assure you this is not a one way street. My life has been truly enriched through the friendships I have formed with my SL loves and friends. I’m proud to say I remain friends with ALL of them to this day. And each of them in their own ways have inspired me to dust off the self I once was, find the self I want to be, and let the glimmer of my own radiance shine through. And that, my friends, is as priceless as any gift.



  1. Trow said,

    Well, you’re not alone…I too feel I’ve been both the receiver and giver of such gifts…and feel I’m a better person for it. SL let’s me explore with others, and that background stays with me, making me more sensitive to others in rl, and more confident with my loved ones. 🙂

  2. Lord Douchbag said,

    would you perhaps hvae any grey poupon there Mary Mcfee??? In all seriousness, i’m speechless, does one have to pay for your services with ones soul? Did I know you in another time? Early memories did show signs I have been on this planet in an earlier time….Could it be our paths crossed then.. perhaps a prehistoric phish show @ the mezoic ampitheater……. These are questions worth pondering nanny poppins………….

  3. neptunesmusings said,

    Wow, that hardly seems like a fair deal even as enriching to your psyche as these experiences may be. Were you having a particularly good day when you wrote this? Or are you just that selfless and already so well-fulfilled that there’s nothing you’d ask for in return?

    OK, yes colour me skeptical – I can’t imagine how you could be a real human being and give so much and need nothing in return. As often as I’ve ever mentored anyone, or been able to give freely of myself, it comes at a cost – energy, time, patience, focus, mental peace – and I have to find some way to charge those batteries back up before I’m able to give as much the next time. Maybe as an introvert I just simply don’t know how energizing it is for others to bask in the glow of someone else’s happiness, feedback, presence. Or maybe as a social phobic, I have never let myself feel that free to just “be” part of someone else’s life.

  4. Cindy Kesey said,

    You’re quite right, noone is that altruistic, not even me. Obviously my soul gets fed when forging these friendships. I’ve always subscribed to the theory that we meet the right people at the right time and for reasons we may not be able to articulate until sufficient time has passed and we’re glancing in our rear view mirror (that whole 20:20 hindsight argument).

    The fact is that I learn from nearly everyone I meet and am hopefully a better person because of each encounter. I’m pretty good at realizing right away if someone is going to be merely an energy suck or if they give back in ways that light my fire too. I try to limit my diet of those “friends” and fill my dance card with someone who is interested in the balance of receiving and giving.

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